Editor’s Note: Read this Letter and more in Letters of the Law: An Anthology, coming to you in August 2020!
Renita is presently a Group Legal Counsel for one of Singapore’s largest real estate group of companies, advising on matters ranging from corporate and litigation, to real estate issues. As a corporate lawyer, she co-heads the Young Lawyers Chapter of the Singapore Corporate Counsel Association, which organises a series of learning and networking events for in-house counsels, and was named one of the top lawyers under 40 in 2017 by the Singapore Business Times. She previously co-authored several articles and tutored at the Bar, and is presently in the midst of completing a Masters of Law and Masters of Public and Business Administration at this mid-level juncture in her life.
Outside of work, Renita is a committee member with the Young Women’s Leadership Connection (YWLC), Family Support Services group of the Eurasian Association, and also actively volunteers, both in a pro bono legal capacity and beyond, with several charity organisations such as Beyond Social Services and the Alzheimer’s Disease Association. She has also started up YWLC’s “Female & Fearless” series of workshops to increase leadership, confidence and communication skills among teenage girls, and recently helps co-lead a ground-up coalition known as the Covid-19 Migrant Support Coalition for migrant workers.
Renita has also co-founded several other initiatives—being, the Kindness Initiative SG to promote kind acts across society, Love our Elderly SG which seeks to connect more young people and adults to our elderly, as well as the Chatty Caterpillar to promote mental health and resilience.
This letter was first written at a point about 10 years after Renita attended law school, and has since been updated during this COVID period. She writes to her younger self in Law school here below.
Dearest Renita (at age 24),
At this age of your early twenties in law school, you will probably not expect half of the things to come your way, as you lead your innocent, happy and wilful life. Nevertheless, I am happy to write to you to encourage you on in these wonderful years of yours, as well as to advise you to take heart for the years ahead.
Being a Person of “Heart”
Law school will be a blissful time generally, as you are actually interested in the classes you go for, and appreciate all that you learn. But you know that you are never a “mugger”, and as crazy as any may wonder or think on all you do during your Law school days, you will continue with your streak of heart and passionate service both in Law school and the days beyond. From producing your graduating class musical to stage productions, law review writings to moots, and numerous Catholic law gatherings, you will remember most of all—the smiles and laughs of the many wonderful and talented classmates that surround you. These friendships will continue to appear as you go along through life, and more than anything you study in the Law, will lend meaning and purpose to your life, as you root for them—and hope they root for you.
Being Hardworking and Persevering
Despite all the many other things you will continue to do, you will somehow make it through law school and go on to one of the best law firms in Singapore, to receive excellent training and tutelage from some of the brightest minds around. It will spark your legal life as you will realise the importance and meaning of all that we learn in school, and do your best to please your clients, albeit while still questioning from time to time whether law is indeed the right path for you, and where exactly in law you belong. Try to spend time, taking a step back, to think of what is most important to you and where you can best contribute; yet, do not be discouraged if you cannot find the answers so readily even then—as life is not a race and everyone takes a different path.
Being Grateful and Kind to Oneself
Even then, it will not always be smooth-sailing, and with break-ups in the background, you will be hurt beyond measure with actions taken, and will then try to busy yourself with work to forget the hurts. You will come to treat each experience as a learning lesson, making you stronger and more independent in yourself. You will realise how different people’s maturity and understandings can be, and that you cannot always control what happens in life. You will then try to make the most of times, to be kind to yourself and treasure good memories, and to move on with as much love, well-wishes and grace as possible.
Being Aware of your Values and Brave to Try New Challenges
Amidst the busy years though, you will learn that as you are preoccupied with work and friends, and trying to please your bosses, and fretting over mistakes (which by the way, will only cause you to make more mistakes—if you focus on that), one of your parents—your dad—who means the world to you—with all the countless sacrifices that he and your mother have made for your family over the years—and the amazing ways that they have inspired you—will be diagnosed with a sudden Stage 4 cancer, which will lead to his death—and the consequent tremendous loneliness and sadness for your mother. You will realise how you may not have treasured each moment, including with your own family—even more, and strive to do better. You will also realise that you may need to stop staying in jobs and places that may no longer fit you, and that it is important to look out for and move on to new opportunities.
Being Confident and Adaptive
As you try to make your family and self a priority, you will land yourself in an excellent in-house posting. Here, you will discover the wondrous extent of all that law can be in the world, and finally feel fulfilled. With an encouraging boss who trusts and empowers you, you will gain confidence like never before, and realise how able you are to really grasp legal concepts and to advise your colleagues well—and perhaps even better than others. You will flourish here as you discover the beauty and possibilities of an in-house role to assist your colleagues, and soon find yourself on a management track as well, with opportunities to rotate, and to learn more on the business front too. While challenges or tough days may appear once in a while, you know that you continue to do your best amidst tight deadlines, and you are blessed with colleagues that understand and appreciate this too.
Being Cause-Driven and Reaching out to Community
At the same time, as you are finally able to balance your work, you realise one does not need to be confined to one role alone and you finally return to all the causes that drive and propel your heart—from the elderly to women to migrant workers, you will remember those who are most in need, and do your best—to not just champion the in-house community which strives to support one another, but also younger women, and various others that need your support. One thing leads to another, and you lead a happy life again, with a supportive husband, and greater treasuring of family, good people and friends.
Being Wiser and Better Ahead
Amidst COVID times, if nothing else, you (and many others) will also see many of the gaps in society, and you vow to strive to do your best still—to improve things as best as you can. With the law in particular, you realise you continue to have a special talent and are privileged to be part of the profession, and you hope and pray that others too will not forget this—and rush back to ordinary days—but that we will all rise up, to step forward to create a better future for all, and to live up to our professional oaths. You reflect then on what a privilege and honour it has been indeed—for all that we are called to do. And so, I wish you dear Renita, and all who read this, to stay strong, be kind, and step forward to serve indeed—always in the days ahead, with humility and heart.
***
June 20, 2020