Katherine* graduated with an LL.B. from a university in the UK. She completed her training with a corporate and commercial law firm and was called to the Singapore Bar in August 2020. She is now an in-house counsel at an asset management firm. She is a pasta-lover, and would eat it several times a week if her colleagues didn’t judge her so hard.
This Letter is addressed to her 26-year-old self, as she commences her practice training contract in the year 2020.
Dear Katherine,
It is January 2020. Fresh out of the Part B Bar examinations, you are settling into your new role as a Practice Trainee. You are full of confidence and optimism as you embark on the final tranche of your legal training. You have your eye on the prize - come July 2020, you will have satisfied all the requirements to be called to the Singapore Bar. You will join the ranks of advocates and solicitors and commence your career in law. At this point, you are filled with a sense of hope and wonder at the possibilities that lie ahead of you. With everything falling into place, what could possibly go wrong?
Katherine, you do not yet know this, but your life is about to be upended. There are growing whispers of a virus with origins in Wuhan, China. Little is known about the cluster of pneumonia cases detected in the Chinese province and you, like most of your peers and family members, are largely unperturbed. Months after the initial transmission, however, the WHO will characterize the outbreak as a public health emergency of international concern. The pandemic will bring the global economy to its knees. There will be chaos and economic hardship. You watch with growing concern as governments worldwide scramble to impose border restrictions and lockdowns. When Singapore imposes its own lockdown, you will find yourself having to adapt to work-from-home arrangements. As an introvert, this is initially a welcome development. With time, however, you find yourself feeling increasingly isolated and frustrated.
Soon enough, you will hear through the grapevine about the pay cuts contemplated by your supervising solicitor. You worry that these pay cuts will be extended to the much-anticipated starting salaries of newly qualified lawyers. Katherine, I am sorry to say this: pay cuts will be the least of your worries, for you will not be retained by the law firm you trained at. You will not be spared the impending carnage of practice trainees being let go. “We are not expanding” – the words uttered by your supervising solicitor will hit you like a ton of bricks. You will receive the news a mere 3 weeks before the end of your practice training period. You will find yourself left out in the cold, desperately pounding on the gates of law firms. Katherine, those gates will be chained shut. You will be an outsider.
To make matters worse, your personal life is falling apart. Katherine, I know right now you are feeling like a failure, fearful and anxious. You feel as though the walls are closing in on you. Overwhelmed by the bleak economic outlook and dire career prospects, you find yourself unravelling and breaking down in tears. You start to spiral out of control emotionally, attempting to overcome your grief by indulging in Netflix marathons and potato chips.
Some advice: as tempting as it is to numb yourself to the pain of loss and rejection, take the time to grieve and to be vulnerable about how you feel. The sooner you face your grief, recognizing and permitting its presence, the better you will feel. Although you cannot alter the dreadful reality of your predicament, you can choose to face the path before you with courage and resilience.
Speak to your seniors – they will tap on their career experience to offer you guidance and wise counsel. They will help you walk the tightrope between sticking it out in private practice and going in-house. The hunt for a job will strengthen your friendships. After all, there is a tremendous sense of camaraderie to be had when unretained lawyers band together to share market information and opportunities (not to mention exchanging memes of Linkedin job applications and horror stories of interviews and salary offers). Their companionship will be a much-needed support.
There is a light at the end of this tunnel: two months after you embark on a series of job applications, interviews and rejections, you will secure an in-house role with a financial services firm.
Katherine, you never wanted to go in-house this early in your career. But let’s face it: you don’t have any other options at this point. When you join the firm, you will be the only lawyer amongst a young, male-dominated team of investment professionals. If you thought you were an outsider before, you are now even more acutely aware of your otherness. Never will you come face to face with a more different breed of professionals. You have the nagging suspicion your colleagues in finance regard the legal function as a conservative, risk-averse bunch of pencil pushers. You will be horrified by their appetite for risk, and what you perceive to be a callous disregard for rules and principles. You will not always agree with their ways. Katherine, do not be too quick to judge. Indeed, with time, you will find yourself revisiting those first impressions stripped of your initial pride and prejudices.
The first three months in-house will be a whirlwind of investment calls, market updates, and finance terminology. You will become acquainted with investment subscription documents, financial regulations and compliance work. Your colleagues will introduce you to the deal blotter, the Bloomberg terminal, Forwards, Futures, Alpha, and Beta. You will sit in on calls with tax lawyers, accountants, investors and bankers. In the financial ecosystem that your team inhabits, you will find yourself looking down from the top where the money is. The view, I assure you, is breathtaking.
Of course, going in-house will not be without its challenges. The business of law is a markedly different beast from the practice of law. Rarely will your colleagues be satisfied with the answer “no”. Risk management, not risk aversion, is the name of the game here. More often than not, the buck will rest with you. But Katherine, you will learn much and grow fast. The dynamic and fast-paced nature of investment deals will keep you on your toes. Your colleagues will prove to be some of the brightest, most driven, and most astute people you will ever meet.
Katherine, 2020 will be a humbling year of frayed nerves, tears and heartache. 2020 will be the year you go in-house fresh out of your training – something you were strongly against doing initially. It will be the year you learn that job security is never guaranteed and to take nothing for granted. 2020 will be a year of crumbling foundations, personal loss, resentment and humiliation. Yet, as you turn the corner into 2021, you will find much to be grateful for: good friends, brilliant colleagues, a supportive family, and a renewed sense of hope.
Love,
Katherine
*Not her real name.